Noob Beginnings - It had to start somewhere, the Noob, or the egg? I think it started when some noobjuice ran down my leg

"How The NoobSquad Began"

By Pkxx

One day, long ago, there was a young N00b who was born in a Cabbage field. The first food that he ever tasted was the sweet, sweet Cabbage. He started doing everything with Cabbage, and he didn't only eat it for breakfast.

This N00b was very very young, being only of level three. One day, while he was picking Potatoes in the Potato field, the ultimate Runescape God, N00b Thor-Allah, spoke to the young N00b. He said that there was much chaos throughout the land of Runescape. When N00bs wondered off into the Wilderness, just looking for a good time, Pker's slashed and slayed them. But, there was a much worse force in the Wilderness. There were the evil, ruthless Ch00bs (there were also H00bs, but who cares about them).

The young N00b agreed that somebody needed to put a stop to it. The God then said he was now counting on the N00b to put a stop to the Pker's and the Ch00bs (and the H00bs, if he had any spare time). He was also told to tell other people about the horror in the lands, and start a group that would be known as "THE N00BSQUAD!!!!" He was also to build a place where the N00bs could plot against the evil Ch00bs. That was to be known as the N00BGUILD!!! Before N00b Thor-Allah bid the young N00b farewell, he gave the N00b Full Bronze Armour, a Bronze long, a yellow cape, and the new name "N00b!" N00b then set off on a journey that would change the world of Runescape forever.

N00b started to tell other people of the evil deeds of the Pker's, ch00bs, and H00bs (if you even care). Nearly everybody that he told agreed that they must put a stop to this. They all got out full Bronze armour, capes, and cabbage. N00b journeyed from Varrock to Yanille, telling everybody he came across. Some joined, when others shoved potatoes and cabbage in his face. Eventually, the N00bsquad was very large. Eventually, there was a whole B00b language. The B00bs also used Cabbages as their currency. With it, they could buy full Bronze, yellow capes, or Potatoes!

Then, N00b remembered the words of N00b Thor-Allah, and they decided to build the N00BGUILD.They started searching throughout the land for a good place to build the guild. They searched for many days and nights, and eventually, they stumbled upon the little town of Draynor. The villagers were more than happy to let the N00bs build their fort there. the n00bs worked and worked (they also got some help from Count Draynor). They never stopped, except for their Cabbage break every 3 hours. Each day, they made more and more progress. After a few months, they were finally finished. The N00BGUILD was complete!

The N00bs were finally able to plot against the ch00bs, Pker's and the H00bs (do they even care!). Then, N00b brought in the round table, and they were the N00bs Of The Round Table.They then started plotting. They did many plans on how to approach their enemies. They tried walking in a circle, but it didn't work out. They then tried walking in a square, triangle, hexagon, octogon, ect, but none of them worked.

Fianally, they came up with the perfect formation. It was in the shape of a snake. They decided to go into the wildy the next weekend to fight a war against the Ch00bs. They prepared for the upcoming battle. They made and begged for Full Bronze and yellow capes. It was war time. The marched into the wildy. They marched and marched and marched, killing a Pker or two on the way. Finally, they arrived in level 35 wilderness. They stopped when they saw blue, the blue on the Ch00bs capes. There was a whole army of them. All of a sudden, N00b heard a sound come from the heap of ch00b yelling "CHARGE!!!!!!".

Everybody rushed in fighting. N00bs threw Cabbage and blinded many a Ch00b. The war was pretty even. The N00bs were killing a lot of Ch00bs. All of a sudden, a Ch00b came up from behind N00b and slashed him! N00b closed his eyes and noticed he was in Lummbridge. He rushed back to the Wildy, where his stuff was laying on the ground! He yelled to all his fellow N00bs to kamakazee the Ch00bs! Many brave N00bs were killed, but they rushed back to the Wildy to help their fellow N00bs. They fought for many hours. Eventually, the Ch00b army was dead! They war was won! The N00bsquad went back to the N00BGUILD and had a rather Noobish drop party! There was burnt pizza, burnt lobbys, potatoes, and of course, Cabbage. The N00bs didn't even need to worry about the H00bs, because they had forgotten how to put on their armour.

The N00bsquad carries on today, with the same traditions as they used to. They kill many Pker's and ch00bs.


By "PKXX" For Planet NoobSquad © 2003